I’m trying to be kind to myself and to those who’ve not always been kind to me. My way of doing this, is often to leave others be. I see it sounds insensitive, sometimes to walk away, but it’s better than the arguing alternative if I actually stay. Sometimes I need a moment or two to process what I have learned. It is surprising and helpful news to me that loyalty needs to be earned.
I don’t believe any of us were put on this planet to be misused, mistreated, or misunderstood. However, when I don’t have the answers this for me, this gentle retreat, is good. What others don’t realize when I go away is that, words can cause a great deal of hurt when you toss them away. I would much rathe...
I like you, against my own better judgement. And I am apparently unable to completely remove you from my phone.
I think they like who I am when I’m with you. I think they’ve never seen me like that before, or at least not for so many many years. It’s a fun confidence that they want me to keep, and perhaps they think you’re the key to that.
But you’re just a result of my own unlocking. You’re new, and you get this version of me that they don’t know because they have too much context.
You are not special. You’re just a boy. How do I remove this weird desire for you?
The calmness of the mind is there,
Yet the conflict exists.
In a state of total awareness,
The self is non-existent.
To find the non-existent,
How does one go by looking for it in the physical world?
For you have to die to enter the realm of something that isn’t there.
The Truth Pt.3
You absolutely cannot allow your own untrustworthy feelings to dictate your walk with God. The devil will have an absolute field day with your life if you allow it & you will know what real loneliness, heaviness, guilt, shame and condemnation are truly like.
I myself underestimated this very thing and 20 years of my life was nothing but a feeling of self desolation rooted in self reliance which led to many wasted years in sadness and heaviness filled with regret.
We must turn over the "I cans" to "Lord, I need you to".
Again, I say
We broke up
I say, "this is the last time."
But I keep letting you back in
Your enticing words
Dripped with thorns that felt like home
Being sure to remind me of what you considered was my worth
I see myself through you
That must be why you hate me
Well, I no longer need you
So goodbye negativity.
And when the night gently spreads its arms
I submit to the sheer shimmering silent charms,
That walks around me like a spectre.
Straight from the pages of my past.
The skeletons that I buried deep,
Within the layers of the labyrinth that I keep.
Steadily rise up to slowly stir
The same old thoughts I left to confer,
The emotions that I left to address,
Wrap me up in a tight embrace
And let my mind mildly caress
The memories that I wish to erase!
Emotions pouring through the skin,
She must confess what's held in for so long.
Before it melts and form another shadow with feelings.
Pastors beheaded, pastors gutted alive in a Turkish hotel room by enemies posed as those who were truly interested in coming to know Christ, persecuted brothers with courage beyond all comprehension bleeding out in agony.
Blood of war crying into the ears of our Lord Christ.
My life, although chosen by God seems so insignificant at times because I dont face the same grave threats as my fallen brothers in the Lord here in the west.
Is it wrong for me to desire living in the same dangers?
The ultimate test of faith.
Found you when your heart was broke
I filled your cup until it overflowed
Took it so far to keep you close
I was afraid to leave you on your own
I said I'd catch you if you fall
And if they laugh, then fuck 'em all
And then I got you off your knees
Put you right back on your feet
Just so you can take advantage of me...
I am not a freaking brick wall!
I can't support other people's emotions on top of my own!
Just because I don't say anything doesn't mean that I not broken inside.
I don't cry because I'm sad.
I cry because I have so much anger inside me I can't scream.
I'm not needy but sometimes I need someone to talk to.
If I don't talk to someone for w while I feel lost.
I always have a smile on my face so that people won't ask if I'm ok.
I hate talking about my emotions with someone because I feel like their judging me, even if they aren't.
I can make a whole movie on my mind just because someone said a small, insignificant sentence in a tone.
"Do they hate me?"
"What did I do wrong?"...
A ella le gustaba hablar, siempre se pensaba y definía como una mujer emocional. También se consideraba muy charlatana, hasta que un día coincidió con él. Su rol pasó a ser más tímido, empezó a escuchar más que hablar, empezó a sentir más que a teorizar sobre sí misma. Se sentía desafinada, insolente, nerviosa y desafiada. Se mostró desnuda y juguetona desde la primera vez que se vieron. Y con esa picardía adolescente se divierte.
Pero escucha voces que le dicen es solo una experiencia más, no pretendas hacer sobrelecturas que no están. No te caigas, pisá firme.
Ella se deja llevar y tuvieron sexo virtual; warro, caliente y juguetón. Aún no se conocen ni tuvieron la alegría o el desdén de...
You were that foundation
Never gonna be another one, no
I followed, so taken
So conditioned, I could never let go
Then sorrow, then sickness
Then the shock when you flip it on me
So hollow, so vicious
So afraid, I couldn't let myself see
That I could never be held
Back or up, no, I hold myself
Check the rep, yep, you know mine well
Forget the rest, let them know my Hell
There and back, yet my soul ain't sell
Kept respect up, the best they fell
Let the rest be the tale they tell
That I was there, saying
In these promises broken, deep below
Each word gets lost in the echo
So, one last lie I can see through
This time, I finally let you go
Test my will, test my heart...
Oh your name is kenzy
Why do you look sad
And would you look at those
bags under your eyes
Did you have a proper meal¿
Two times a week does not suffice
Now young lady do not try to fight
We are here to help you alright
Are you gonna cry¿
I didn’t mean to snap at you
We can change your life
Just give me your hand tonight
Wow your completion is so white
And your cold to the touch
Are you scared for your life
I would be, you don’t look all that good
And thats me being nice
You can admit to me about your depression
And all your insomniac nights
I just want to be that person who helps you kenzy
I want to tell you your fine
i hate her!!!
Sire is fighting with His wife again. Though He said nothing about her today, and i didn't ask, it's kind of obvious to me that He's getting into a certain mindset to deal with her come the end of the day.
i sent Him my usual "Good night" message and told Him that i love Him in case He's not here for me to tell in the morning (i always try to make my final words to Him "i love You" - no matter how bad a day W/we have had).
Anyways, He replied back and bade me "Good night" in return - but He forgot to tell me that He loves me. i know that it's just a small detail and i'm probably thinking more of it than i should - but it made me feel that there is a sense of sad...
We mixed up memories, not good or bad memories.
It's like one bottle of black ink and one of blue, and your favourite colour is black so you always love to remember the black.
Once i heard from a psychologist that when you burn a memory with an emotion it's become impossible to forget.
Because when we sad, fade, pale, unhappy, uncomfortable, not feeling good and low, in a bad mood and angry we are more emotional and remember that part of life more prominent than the happiest time we had.
Don't try to forget your past because it is a core part of your soul and personality, just try to summarise it properly and feeling wo blessed you are and bliss from heaven you have on earth with no extra ...
If your heart hurts a little after letting go of someone or something, that's okay.
It just means that your feelings were genuine.
No one likes ends.
No one likes pain.
But sometimes, we have to put things that were once good to an end after they turn toxic to our wellbeing.
Not every new beginning is meant to last forever.
And not every person who walks into your life is meant to stay.
U tryna shoot me in the bak
Turns out its me inna mask
Replaying all my dreams
Its just me fighting my reality
My biggest dreams
Everything i want to accomplish
Slipping down the stream
Jo bs ma ho or bebas b ho.
Esi koi surat meri dastras ma ho.
Tujhe yu dekhna acha nahi lagta ,
Tere chehre pe ye maayusi ka pehra Nhi jachta ..
Tujh ko udaas dekh ke khud udaas hoti thi jo main ,
Tu mujhe manane ko jo muskurane lagta tha,
Ab toh Wo bahana bhi mera mujhe saccha nhi lagta..
Main tujh ko kehti rahi ki duniya ki tujh ko samajh nahin,
Par aaj dil dukhta h jb tu beparvah Nhi dikhta..
Bahut taklif hoti h jab koi meri parvah Nhi karta ..
Kash tu wapas tu aur main wahi main ho pate,
Par gujre hue Palo ka laut ke aana ab mumkin Nhi lgta.
Guzarish hain toh tujhse itni ki jindgi ko yu jaaya na kar,
Tujh ko khush dekh ke milta hain sukun ,usse mujhe ruswa na kar.